The Pit

As I hung up the phone, I thought “another friend has slipped into some form of depression.” My heart hurts for my friend. I know depression so well having been there. I have lived in that pit .

Dear Friend,
There are so many reasons for us to slip into the pit of despair. I am not going to name specifics; you will know if you are living in that pit and each individual slips or falls into it for different reasons. I am not speaking of clinical depression, that is to be left for the trained experts. I am speaking of the trials that come your way and you think there is no way out of the pit.
I want you to know I have been there. I have lived through one of the lowest times in my life; My pit was so deep that all the cranes in the world could not have pulled me out. I remember a heaviness in my heart that I thought could never be lifted. When would I laugh again, when would I smile again? Why couldn’t I fix myself, why couldn’t I fix the problem? Why couldn’t I make it better?
Praying, reading scripture, or attending church did nothing to help me find my way out. I just knew I was in a wrestling match with the devil, he who is ever so cunning. The longer I was in the pit the more comfortable it was to live there. My self pity became comforting and now I wonder if I wore it like a shroud. I was living there rent free so I thought, and I began to set up house keeping, moved in my furniture, hung pictures and decided to stay for the long haul.
But the reality was I was not wrestling with the devil. Just like Jacob I was wrestling with God. All along He was there for me, but I was not listening. I was in my control mode; “I can do anything” including controlling others. I wouldn’t let go, I had to save others and I also had to succeed .When I now reflect on it, I never trusted God. Oh, I talked the talk, but I was not walking the walk. As someone once said “using God’s vocabulary but not his dictionary.” A professor of my faith but not a possessor of my faith.
Thankfully God does not give up on those of us who are stubborn. It must have been through “divine providence”(I was way too comfortable to move out by myself,) that I saw the error of my ways. Slowly, I began the process of giving my troubles to Him, of having faith in Him . It was not easy moving out of that pit, especially since it meant not getting my way. And life would never return to the way it had been or the way “I” thought it should be. By the Grace of God I do not live there anymore.
The scars from that time period are still very real to me and all are not healed. But those scars I have earned and they are a reminder of a time when I did not put my faith in God.
My message is simple to define but oh so difficult to fix. You have to put your faith in God. You cannot mechanically go through your daily Christian rituals expecting a miracle, and all the while not trusting in God. You must believe in him enough to carry your burdens to the foot of the cross and lay them before Him. Don’t waste valuable time fighting with God. Why do we say we believe in Him, if we don’t have faith that He is in control and He will be with us through our most difficult times?
I often think of Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane. “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” Matt 22:42, the ultimate example of trusting in your Father. Those words should be the mantra for those who are depressed. And believing them WILL bring peace.
Here is an excise for you to do, it is between you and God. Get yourself a notebook which will become your journal. Write on the front “Blessed Daily by God. For the next thirty days journal how God has blessed you that day.
You will be amazed by how He works daily in your life. God said He would provide you with enough manna for the day. Trust Him.
There will also be days when you will think “I didn’t hear from God today.” Believe me those can be the best days. Why you ask? Because in his silence you will seek Him and your relationship with Him will deepen. Oswald Chambers said “ If God has given you a silence, He is bringing you into the great run of His purposes.” And you will find He gave you the best gift that day, Himself.
This is a powerful exercise! You and God alone in the pit. One day, one rung at a time He will help you climb out of the pit into the sunshine of His world. God Bless.

Your friend, e

I waited patiently for the Lord;
He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit.
Out of the mud and mire;
He put a new song in my mouth,
Psalm40:1-3 (NIV)